In retrospect, I now feel I understand the fundamental factor which led to my severe bends hit that sunny July 14th in Palau. It wasn't because I went too deep or stayed too long. It wasn't because of the decompression meter I was using. It wasn't even because my pressure gauge malfunctioned. Although these were all contributing factors, they were not the fundamental reason I got bent. The real reason was that I had a very bad attitude about deep diving. I got caught in a trap which snares many young, bold, and "immortal" divers - the trap of overconfidence. Since I was continuously pushing the limits - and getting away with it - I felt overconfident about pushing the limits even further.

I was sure that I would never get bent. I regarded all of the emphasis on safe diving practices and self dicipline as "sport-diver crap", and I felt as though I was exempt from following conventional guidelines. I was wrong...almost dead wrong! So why, then, do I continue to dive deep? It would be naive of me to think that I have "learned my lesson". The risk of decompression sickness follows anyone who breathes gases at greater than one atmosphere pressure - that risk cannot be avoided, and it increases with increased depth of diving. Will I ever get bent again? To be honest, I don't know.

Many friends and colleagues feel as though I'm living on borrowed time. Maybe I am. But at least I have changed my attitude about deep diving. I no longer view it as a test of my abilities, or as a means to demonstrate my courage. Statistics of diving accidents suggest that I am more likely to get bent again, now that I've been hit once already. I'm not convinced this is true, but whenever I find myself hanging on a decompression line after a deep dive, I always assume that it is.